Sunday, 30 March 2008

Gift of Baptism

Today is a silent and yet special day for me. 17 years ago, on this date, I received the gift of baptism at the Church of St. Bernadette, and back then was the Easter Vigil. 17 years seem long, yet, I still feel as if I am at the beginning, learning more about the faith, about Jesus, about God, about the Church.... This reminds me of the teaching of our founder, Blessed James Alberione, the attitude of studiosita--to learn from all. We will never finish our learning, and I agree this is the beauty of being human. Till the day we die, we continue to learn from everything.

Today, I am thankful for all the people who in one way or another, help in the growth of my faith--the sponsors, my friends, my god-mother, my sisters in the congregation, particularly my formators and those who journey with me. They have been the one to help me see and experience the love of God till this day. Without them, I would not have reach where I am today. A very big Thank You.

Thursday, 20 March 2008


No-one understands me:
Sometimes something forces me to do things,
to go against his teaching,
to act without love.
Afterwards I hate myself.
I'm not normal like the others.
I know I am an oddity,
and sometimes it's as though
I'm programmed to do bad things.
Even so, I never dreamt that I
could be so wicked, so full of sin, so evil
as to betray the only one who loved me,
the only one I loved: Jesus.

I was greedy for the money, of course.
I had always been poor
and I had never owned
thirty pieces of silver.
It seemed beautiful to me then,
that blood money.
But worse than the money was the kiss,
hideous, horrible hypocrisy!
How could he bear it so calmly,
looking at me with pity?

I hadn't given any thought
to what would happen.
I watched and listened steathily,
the horror grew
and I was powerless to stop it,
I who had set it all in motion.

When I saw him hanging there,
my Jesus, nailed to a cross
I cried to the Father,
'Let us change places.
Let him come down
and nail me there to die'.
But nothing happened.

I knew I was only fit for hell,
beyong forgiveness,
worth absolutely nothing.
It was time to end my useless life
my pitiful existence.
So I took a rope
and went to find a tree.

(taken from Lent (for the not-so-holy) by Anthea Dove, Columba Press, 2006)

Saturday, 1 March 2008

The Pharisee

In today's gospel, Jesus told us the parable about the Pharisee and the Tax collector in Luke 18:9-14. It never struck me as before, that the Pharisee actually prayed to himself. Then I came across this beautiful words from the perspective of the Pharisee:

It was a revelation.
It happened after I had prayed.
I was leaving the temple
and I happened to glance across
at that wretched tax-collector.
It was just the look on his face.
He wasn't wretched after all.
He was trule at peace.
I saw that he was blessed
in a way I had never been.
I knew I had missed something absolutely vital!
So I went back into the temple.
I said nothing.
I simply stood in the presence of our God
until it slowly dawned on me,
the truth about myself:
my pride, my contempt, my self-righteousness.
I knew then that I was a sinner,
and I asked the Lord for mercy.

I stayed a long time in the temple,
and when I walked away,
I knew there was just a chance
that one day my face too
might be like that tax-collector's,
glowing with peacefulness
and quiet happiness.

(from Lent (for the not-so-holy) by Anthea Dove)

Thank you, John Paul II

Here it is, the English translation of Grazie, Giovanni Paolo II. Enjoy!